Last time on Thoughts From A Recovering Cynic:
At this point my arm was throbbing and relief was all I wanted. It was frozen in an awkward position and I just wanted it to be relaxed.
"As fast as possible" I said.
Little did I know the pain I felt at that moment was but a taste of what was to come.
----
I arrived, swim trunks still wet and shirtless to the emergency room. To my surprise (and thankfulness) no one else was present and therefore they ushered me right into the ER without even having to wait.
First stop was to see the nurse at the office. He took my blood pressure, asked me questions, and got me checked in. As I sat askew, clearly listing to the left, he asked if it was my left shoulder I had dislocated. I said "Well if it isn't then I have bigger issues than a dislocated shoulder. Little Quasimodo going on here."
Finally the congenial interrogation ended and I was helped to the hospital room where I was greeted by 2 nurses and 2 doctors. One of the doctors asked me to lay face-down on the bed with my left arm and shoulder hanging off. I couldn't. I mean, I didn't know how to lay down when my arm was frozen in front of me. The slightest movements sent excruciating pain throughout my shoulder and back.
With the help of the doctors and a good dosage of pain, I was able to lay down.
Then the doctors began discussing the next course of action with the nurses. In my mind I was going to receive a shot, morphine, something strong, so that I would feel nothing. It only made sense to numb the pain. After all I wasn't in some triage unit in the middle of the jungle 80 years ago. We have modern medicine, modern techniques.
However this was not the case.
Soon both doctors and nurses came to my bed with one nurse grabbing my right arm, another holding my feet, and one doctor grabbing my dangling left hand and the other placing both hands on my left shoulder. I had an uncomfortable feeling with what was about to happen. And without warning the doctor holding my left hand began pulling down and the other doctor pushed on my shoulder.
Now I'm no warrior when it comes to experience with pain. I have neither fought in war, been stabbed, shot, burned, nor given birth. But the pain I felt as they began to pull and push on my shoulder was overwhelming.
Prior to that moment I thought I handled pain well. Clearly I'm weaker than I think because tears formed and streamed down my face while I attempted to silently bear the pain. However I found myself hyperventilating and unable to slow down my breathing.
The doctors kept saying "You need to calm your breathing. Stop tensing your right arm. Stop breathing so fast! Think that you're back on the beach! Don't tense up!"
Yeah. Because this is just like being back on the beach! What type of beaches do you doctors go to anyways??
They didn't stop. They kept going, pushing, pulling, trying to get my shoulder to pop back in.
Nothing.
I'm not sure how many attempts were made, but finally they stopped.
The doctors and the nurses let go and I lay there, paralyzed in pain and breathing uncontrollably fast.
The doctors decided upon discourse that because of my regular workout routine over the previous four months there was "too much muscle" around my shoulder to allow it to be pushed back in.
Normally I would have been flattered by such a comment. But in that moment I was hating myself for having ever gone to the gym.
The doctors decided 10mg of morphine would be needed before attempting to put my should back in. They said "after you get some morphine you won't feel a thing."
After receiving the morphine the doctors returned. This time they had me sit up. One doctor wrapped a sheet around my chest and the other took a sheet and wrapped in around my left wrist. Then they began pulling in opposite directions.
Now if they thought morphine was going to numb the pain they were tragically wrong. Not only did the morphine not numb the pain, but it felt as if I had not been given any morphine at all. I could feel with every synchronized pull, pain shoot throughout my entire left side.
At some point I had hoped to feel a "pop" and then a relief from pain. But this never happened. After pulling several times, the doctors ceased their medieval medical practices and felt my shoulder. "It feels like it's in more than it was before. Not sure it's in all the way though." said one doctor.
Both an X-ray and CAT scan were required before determining my shoulder had indeed gone back in.
I left 2 hours after arriving, exhausted and sore. After grabbing a strong pain killer I promptly headed back to the graduation party to finish out the day's festivities.
At this point my arm was throbbing and relief was all I wanted. It was frozen in an awkward position and I just wanted it to be relaxed.
"As fast as possible" I said.
Little did I know the pain I felt at that moment was but a taste of what was to come.
----
I arrived, swim trunks still wet and shirtless to the emergency room. To my surprise (and thankfulness) no one else was present and therefore they ushered me right into the ER without even having to wait.
First stop was to see the nurse at the office. He took my blood pressure, asked me questions, and got me checked in. As I sat askew, clearly listing to the left, he asked if it was my left shoulder I had dislocated. I said "Well if it isn't then I have bigger issues than a dislocated shoulder. Little Quasimodo going on here."
Finally the congenial interrogation ended and I was helped to the hospital room where I was greeted by 2 nurses and 2 doctors. One of the doctors asked me to lay face-down on the bed with my left arm and shoulder hanging off. I couldn't. I mean, I didn't know how to lay down when my arm was frozen in front of me. The slightest movements sent excruciating pain throughout my shoulder and back.
With the help of the doctors and a good dosage of pain, I was able to lay down.
Then the doctors began discussing the next course of action with the nurses. In my mind I was going to receive a shot, morphine, something strong, so that I would feel nothing. It only made sense to numb the pain. After all I wasn't in some triage unit in the middle of the jungle 80 years ago. We have modern medicine, modern techniques.
However this was not the case.
Soon both doctors and nurses came to my bed with one nurse grabbing my right arm, another holding my feet, and one doctor grabbing my dangling left hand and the other placing both hands on my left shoulder. I had an uncomfortable feeling with what was about to happen. And without warning the doctor holding my left hand began pulling down and the other doctor pushed on my shoulder.
Now I'm no warrior when it comes to experience with pain. I have neither fought in war, been stabbed, shot, burned, nor given birth. But the pain I felt as they began to pull and push on my shoulder was overwhelming.
Prior to that moment I thought I handled pain well. Clearly I'm weaker than I think because tears formed and streamed down my face while I attempted to silently bear the pain. However I found myself hyperventilating and unable to slow down my breathing.
The doctors kept saying "You need to calm your breathing. Stop tensing your right arm. Stop breathing so fast! Think that you're back on the beach! Don't tense up!"
Yeah. Because this is just like being back on the beach! What type of beaches do you doctors go to anyways??
They didn't stop. They kept going, pushing, pulling, trying to get my shoulder to pop back in.
Nothing.
I'm not sure how many attempts were made, but finally they stopped.
The doctors and the nurses let go and I lay there, paralyzed in pain and breathing uncontrollably fast.
The doctors decided upon discourse that because of my regular workout routine over the previous four months there was "too much muscle" around my shoulder to allow it to be pushed back in.
Normally I would have been flattered by such a comment. But in that moment I was hating myself for having ever gone to the gym.
The doctors decided 10mg of morphine would be needed before attempting to put my should back in. They said "after you get some morphine you won't feel a thing."
After receiving the morphine the doctors returned. This time they had me sit up. One doctor wrapped a sheet around my chest and the other took a sheet and wrapped in around my left wrist. Then they began pulling in opposite directions.
Now if they thought morphine was going to numb the pain they were tragically wrong. Not only did the morphine not numb the pain, but it felt as if I had not been given any morphine at all. I could feel with every synchronized pull, pain shoot throughout my entire left side.
At some point I had hoped to feel a "pop" and then a relief from pain. But this never happened. After pulling several times, the doctors ceased their medieval medical practices and felt my shoulder. "It feels like it's in more than it was before. Not sure it's in all the way though." said one doctor.
Both an X-ray and CAT scan were required before determining my shoulder had indeed gone back in.
I left 2 hours after arriving, exhausted and sore. After grabbing a strong pain killer I promptly headed back to the graduation party to finish out the day's festivities.
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